Write. Your life depends on it.
A friend of mine had a picture of me recently. I was having an injection of ink. Someone was injecting ink 
right into my spine. Like an epidural. Since then people have had other pictures of me, always writing: in the sky, in the clouds, in the stars. Sometimes I even have a pen with golden ink, and while that sounds nice, inspiring even, it also scares me.
The thing is, I would love to be a ‘proper’ writer, to write for a living and just know that I am a writer and that it’s what I do, and who I am just like I pray and seek after God.
But I am afraid to get up out of my hiding place. I am afraid to enter the sunlight of my unveiling. I am afraid to take this chance and to actually believe that I can make a living with my writing. My view of myself, of everything, has been so boxed in, so closed, and ultimately rather unrealistic or just downright depressing.
I feel that God is calling me out and up and the truth is that when I think of my world through the eyes of myself as a writer, dependent on God, my eyes then widen and I feel truly awake alive. It is when I allow myself to do the things of status quo, to do what is expected instead of what is right or truly meant to be, that my heart hides in a corner and the life bleeds from me. I am meant to write, really to write, and to do that more than any other thing. I’m meant to write for a living.
But I don’t know how to do this.
I’m not good at this.
What makes this time any different than any time before? Is it that I am more determined? Or is it that I have nothing to lose? I don’t know.
I don’t know how to do this. I just know that somehow, this time, it needs to happen.
Help, Lord. Help me to believe and help me to succeed at this. Because after all, you told me to.
You and me both. I was just quoting this entry in my blog. I’m feeling a Jeremiah-like burn to write, even just stupid stuff, to keep my skills up, to keep my ideas coming, but I’m scared of letting folks see and critique. I want to get to the top of the mountain without passing that part where you have to pull yourself up by your hands. I can do it, I think, especially if it’s really Him calling, prodding, pushing… which is another reason I find your words so encouraging. Because if He’s pushing you, then it really could be what He’s leading here, too.
I can do all things through Christ Who gives me strength.
Even if it’s something not so ’spiritual’ sounding as writing science fiction.
God bless you Kimberely. Thank you.
SARA