my heart in this season

I’ve been in Vancouver for three months now and it’s still strange. It’s so good, really, to be so near family and to sort of reclaim myself, my old stomping grounds and my roots. But there are constant reminders in this city of things and people I once ran from.

And yet in the quietness of a day which has featured little more than kite flying, coffee, tea, a little bit of form filling out (for student loans), and random conversation… I find myself again pondering the gift of being here, the gift of my job, the restoration of relationships, and the coming weeks full of friends, family, and hopefully a promotion at work.

Did I mention my manager suggested I do this three month contract gig? Something normally which only goes to people with alot more seniority in the company than I? Yeah. Exciting. I’ve never been looked highly upon at work so I am pleased, and especially pleased given what the contract gig actually is for (I’ll give more details when it’s official)!

If I could summarize what is happening in my heart right now I would say that my heart is sloughing off the lies and the pretenses and just becoming true and true enough to accept the truth of who I am and who the God of love is and what it means to be loved unconditionally, for real. It’s as though all the things I could be are being replaced simply and delicately and heroically by the truth and the authentic me.

It’s exciting and strange.

I have to keep reminding myself to just be present because that’s what He told me to do. Be present. And be at peace. Everything will be sorted in due time. Right now we’re working on my heart.

It’s crazy how everything comes back to love.

~ by tardistraveler on June 28, 2009.